I’m going to Miami in a couple weeks. I’m going with my friend Emilio.
We’re gonna drink a lot and go to the beach.
Most wives would have trouble with their husbands going on drinking trips with their degenerate friends, but not Staci. She loves when I leave.
More troubling is the fact that she gave me a pack of Crest teeth-whitening strips to use before the trip.
I’m not sure what that means.
The only thing I can figure out is that she has a boyfriend and wants to leave me for him. But for that to happen without her feeling guilty, she needs me to find a girlfriend. But she doesn’t think that can happen.
Unless my teeth are whiter.
The box of whitening strips promises white teeth in ten days. I’ve been wearing them for five.
Here’s where we stand:
So in just five more days I should be one of the Beautiful People.
Wish me luck.
For Staci’s sake.