I Take On the Weirdos, So You Don’t Have To

I was waiting at a stoplight this morning when a yellow Corvette pulled up alongside me.

I looked at the driver.  He was an older guy.  Bald.

I didn’t like him.

Something about his olderness combined with his baldiness and his Corvettedness just screamed “weirdo.”

So I put my car in park and revved the engine.

Which roared with all the screaming fury that one could expect of  a four-cylinder Honda Accord with a child seat in the back.

When the light turned green, I popped the engine into gear and beat him through the intersection.

Granted, I was the only one racing, but still, it felt good.

Eventually, he pulled up alongside me.

Then he just stared.

Not saying a single word.  Just silent.

Just like a weirdo.

19 thoughts on “I Take On the Weirdos, So You Don’t Have To

  1. Always good to show up “Corvette Guy”

    Especially in your little stock ricer🙂

  2. Gandhi was a bald, non-weirdo older guy who was assasinated in 1948. Missed the debut of the Corvette by five years.

  3. So, I’m making a list of cars you don’t like, and so far I’ve come up with Hummers and ‘Vettes. Are there more? Do you only “approve” of Japanese cars with lawnmower engines? Just curious.

  4. By now, you’d think even the self-absorbed bald middle-aged guys going through a mid-life crisis in your neck of the woods would have heard of you…perhaps he had, but since it was his first encounter, he still didn’t believe it.

    And self-absorbed bald middle-aged guys don’t own Corvettes to race other guys-they own them to get younger chicks to pay less attention to the, shall we say, small size of other tools they posess.

  5. That reminded me of my old guy in a Corvette story – although my guy had a red convertable with a really young girl in the passenger seat. We were probably 20 years old, at a stoplight, next to this guy (my passenger side next to his drivers side). My friend (in the passenger seat) jokingly said, fairly loud “dude sorry about your penis” (can I use that here – it is a clinical term) forgetting that the window was open. He did not look happy. I almost died laughing. My friend just acted like nothing happened but did shut the window.

  6. The guy just stared and didn’t say anything because you, my friend, just encountered a PLUGGER!

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