Today’s Mission: Stupid

Today I need to write a whole bunch of croc strips.

Must think stupid.

I know what you’re thinking:  Not a difficult task for me.

While this is true, I think the croc strips are the hardest for me to write.  Rat and Pig come much more naturally to me.   Rat’s voice is effectively my voice.  If I could, I’d write for Rat every day.

But it’s not the same with the crocs.  Their jokes tend to be more visual and physical, so the art matters more.  Plus, I can’t just give them any thought I want to, like I can Rat.  In the crocs’ case, they’re limited to one basic thought:  Eat.  Or, “eet.”  They’re almost like a strip within a strip.

For all these reasons, when I do the croc strips, I try to do a whole bunch at once.

I’m often asked where the crocs’ accent comes from.  Everybody that writes to me has a guess, and most are sure they’re right.  I’ve heard hundreds of guesses, the most common being Cajun. But I’ve also heard Russian, Mexican, Asian, Greek, Hungarian, Romanian, Middle Eastern, etc.

The truth is that I was inspired by the Saturday Night Live skit where Frankenstein, Tarzan and Tonto all try to talk with their characteristic broken syntax.

In the croc’s case, they say “me”  where they should say “I”; can’t conjugate verbs correctly; change most “i”s to “ee”s (e.g. “heet” instead of “hit”); drop a lot of “L”s and “R”s (e.g. “Peese” instead of “please”; “zeeba” instead of “zebra”) and then toss in a little Valley Girl (“Me is like, ‘Wow’).

The lower case writing was inspired by how Bill Watterson wrote the dialogue for the Calvin and Hobbes’ bully, Moe.

So here I go, off to write for the reptilian terrors.  Please wish me luck.

Or better yet:

Peese weeshes me luck.

confused croc

37 thoughts on “Today’s Mission: Stupid

  1. I just made a disturbing observation from looking at the large version of the Croc in this post.

    Am I the only one who sees an entirely separate head and face on the end of the Croc’s snout? Or should I just lay off the brown acid this time of the morning?

  2. You could prepare like Val Kilmer prepared for playing Jim Morrison, eat tons of acid, and ‘be the Croc’. I always thought the croc accent was Australian mixed with,….well croc!

  3. Stephan, it might help if you think “stoopid”. 🙂
    Best of luck, and I look forward to reading these next February.


  4. For what it’s worth, your croc strips are my favorites! They always make me laugh.

  5. Hullllooo Steva neighba! Me weesh you luck. Me tink crocs get bad reputashun tho. We improov us each day and watch Deescovry Channel and Aneemul Planit to learn gud hunting. We see Horse Wisperer too…maybe we make Zeeba jump off cliff. So peese be nice and let us eet Zeeba neighba. Tank you.

  6. Good luck! Too bad we’ll have to wait 8 months to see the result of the work since you’re insanely ahead on deadlines I hear.
    Why not send the crocs to the circus– there’s lots of nummy food there– elephants, lions, bearded ladies…

  7. Was I hallucinating, or was the croc in yesterday’s strip jerking off?

  8. To me they always sound like Grover from the Muppets with a vague accent.

  9. Meester Pastis,

    Da brudderhood nedz more zeeba peese drawz more fud.


  10. I’ve always loved the Crocs, some of the best comics in recent years has often come from the Frat and Larry’s family, but I occasionally do feel that there’s sometimes a little too much Zeeba Zeeba Eata.

    The bulk of Croc comics that, as you say, you tend to write may also be an indicator as to why there’s a crowd of crocs. Then again, I know they are more popular for most fans, and they tend to make the most dough. d:

    Again, love the whole of ZEE and Larry and his family (I even love Biff, the biggest croc idiot), but I would point out that you could occasionally write more of Rat, Pig and others . . . especially Rat’s writing musings.

    Do you realize there’s been like ONE Angry Bob so far this year (maybe two)? I remember those used to be a Sunday staple!

  11. Beeg fat eediot Steven no can right croc streeps! me is like, dat so funny!

    Seriously, you do great on the strips; it’s a testament to your writing skills that you can come up with hilarious ideas in a style of humor that’s not your first choice, AND that relies more heavily on visual gags which are harder than verbal.

    Keep it up!!

  12. Hello Stephan,

    The crocs are amazing because they’re so stupid and because of the way they speak. I’m from Belgium and “eet” is exactly what we say for “eat”. That’s why it’s even funnier for me. Did you notice that the end of their mouth is a little face in it’s own?

    Best wishes,

  13. I recently watched a play called “I Have Here Before Me a Remarkable Document Given To Me By a Young Lady From Rwanda” and the character in it called Julliet had a Rwandan accent, and while I was listening to her, I thought, “Wow, she sounds just like the crocs!” So to me, it sounds like the crocs have a Rwandan accent. Just a thought.

  14. I always thought of the Crocs as speaking Serbian with a severe speech impediment. We always think people speaking in foreign languages are pronouncing their words with academic precision. Like hell. They got just as many people with whacked-out speech impediments and impenetrable accents as we got here.

  15. Good luck. What follows is the inevitable reader suggestion.

    Perhaps they try to open a fast-food zebra joint, “Zeeba Keeng”? All of the value meals could have specific names of the relatives of Zebra, and thus keep changing daily, making it impossible for them to put an order together right. I also see a possible play-in with Larry and his wife.

    End reader input.

  16. wow, I love the crocs! they are sooo funny. Anyway, peese send me emeel. Emeel me at peese, or me eet you.
    visit my site soon Wait why do you need to right so many croc strips in one hackin’ day? i got some ideas so email me. one includes popcorn, a rope, and pie. think just think what you can do with that.

  17. If You Reference “Soul Coughing” in a Croc Strip i Will Send $38.43 to You

  18. Just stop drinking your morning coffee. Coffee deprivation always works. One of your funniest lines is “Woomun!Larry need CUPPA JOE!” I know that was inspired somehow.

  19. a few more days of school and I will be channeling the Crocs – which isn’t good considering I just won a teaching award – but I really want to say “Peese Shut Mouf” to some of my 7th grade students. Perhaps they are channeling them? So perhaps they could go back to school as Middle Schoolers?

  20. the crocs are, by far, my most favoritest comic strip characters ever and I chuckle constantly when I think of them. i have even gone so far as to address all of my female acquaintances as ‘woomun.’

    thank you so much for the bright spots.

  21. for some reason i always thought it was a Jamaican accent. i think it’s because of the ‘woomun’ part. i wonder if the word croceese will make it in the dictionary.

  22. look, i hate to put it this way – but the ones that aren’t fun for you to write aren’t all that fun for me to read. it’s obvious you have some croc fans, but they’re not my favorite either.

    write what you enjoy writing.

  23. Ha! That’s EXACTLY the accent I thought. I said to myself, “Lulu, I’ll bet their accent was inspired by that Saturday Night Live skit where Frankenstein, Tarzan and Tonto all try to talk with their characteristic broken syntax.” One point for superior intelligence.

  24. The croc and zebra (or just the crocs) are my favorite comic strip of all time. I can identify with Rat since I am not any sweeter on the world than he.

    The crocs though…I love the crocs!

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